Mana mamat tu tau?

Hmmm mana Mus tau aku kat sini? Pepagi sebelum subuh ni dia call n suara very disappointed sbb aku x bgtau dia (nak kena rasa bersalah ke ni ek?). Aku xleh nak fikir... Blank jap. Last2 aku suh dia call esok (siang karang) as aku still tgh sakit lagi ni (but mmg pun still tgh sakit). Last sentence from him buat aku touched (mengingatkan aku ttg dia yg dulu) tp aku x jwb pape. Diam lebih baik walhal air mata start meleleh gak td (dlm keadaan aku sakit n sengsorg gini, kat dlm ward single but besar ni what can I say? Rasa sorg sgt weyh 😭). N actually aku appreciate sgt dia masih cari aku dlm keadaan gini. Mmm takpe abaikan je lah. BTW, arini takde lak Mus bg aku quote? 

I'm receiving (I mean, my body) the last pain killer in iv drip. After this (after it's finish) , dah start to get ready with the exact obstacle. Hmmm.... Need to get use to it zira.

Klah.... Nanti bila a ok byk sikit, aku citer chronology of this journey ye diari sayang. Now, takleh lagi beb. Even aku nak solat pun tak boleh lagi ni sbb aku masih tak dpt nak mandi wajib (bangun dr pengsan). Camne tu. Nak g tandas pun perlu ada nurse (aku suh nurse tunggu kat katil je 😅 after dia bukak drip dr line aku ni jap sementara aku kat dlm tandas). Segan aih.

Klah.... Need to stop. Babai sayang.